I Hab a Bed Cold

Ellen (from Gdynia, Poland): Two things I really hate:  people with colds and people on extended winter vacations.

I had my winter vacation, and it was wonderful.  But it’s over.  Where does everyone else get off, snowboarding in the Tatras or sunbathing in Tunisia?

I guess I can still cough out a seasonal bah, humbug, because Santas continue to smirk everywhere and the pretty tree lights dazzle after sunset as they have from the first of November.  Asking friends when all the decorations come down resulted in “I don’t know – maybe Easter?” to a shrug to what may or may not be the truth:  “It’s bad luck to take down the lights or pitch your tree until after Epiphany!”

OK, I’m going to take answer no. 3 to heart.  Aside from not being interested in inviting bad luck, it gives me an excuse to continue to light the tea candles on my little wooden tree.  The fragrance and cheery light it provides the entry still warm me. 

No need launch an explanation about my feelings for people with colds:  aren’t they as common as the nasty little virus itself?  We all shun even those nearest and dearest who start sniffling, gustily sneezing and hacking, dull-eyed with pathetic red-tipped noses.  Ick!  Let them stay home, out of sight and reach of contagion, under glass, somewhere, anywhere, except near me.  I don’t want to catch it. 

Well, damn it, I did.  I think.  Don’t know from whom, but last night’s irritating little throat tickle and this morning’s series of sneezes have escalated into the vile real thing. Absolute confirmation is the lack of appetite.

Aside from how tiresome it is to have the symptoms and be a pariah myself for a short time, what really is annoying is how undignified colds are.  I don’t want relapsing fever or dysentery or anything else genuinely incapacitating, but at least these sound exotic and interesting – much better than “I hab a bed cold.”   

It’s a beautiful day out there, almost a balmy 50, but I’m keeping my crabby, snuffling self indoors. 

Copyright 2008 by Ellen Dlott 

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